Kyle Count-Up
relentless hunter mentality
Time elapsed since Kyle was last employed, counting up from .
things that have happened since Kyle was last employed
Argentina wins the World Cup; Messi finally gets his ring.
A Chinese spy balloon drifts across America before getting shot down.
GPT-4 launches; everyone's coworker is quietly a chatbot now.
King Charles III's coronation.
The OceanGate Titan submersible implodes en route to the Titanic.
Barbenheimer weekend: pink and the apocalypse, same ticket stub.
Taylor and Travis go public; the NFL is never the same.
Hamas attacks Israel; the war in Gaza begins.
The Eras Tour grosses $2B+ and single-handedly props up the economy.
Usher's Super Bowl halftime show; Taylor flies in from Tokyo to watch.
The Kate Middleton Photoshop saga sends the internet into detective mode.
A total solar eclipse sweeps across North America.
Kendrick vs. Drake; “Not Like Us” detonates the charts.
“Hawk Tuah” girl goes viral from one street interview.
Assassination attempt on Trump at a rally in Butler, PA.
Biden drops out of the race; brat summer is officially declared.
Paris Olympics: Simone Biles' comeback, the swimmable-ish Seine, and pommel-horse guy.
Moo Deng, a damp and furious baby hippo, becomes the internet's favorite.
Hurricanes Helene and Milton batter the US Southeast.
Trump wins the 2024 election.
UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson is killed in Manhattan.
Luigi Mangione arrested in Altoona, PA.
The Assad regime falls in Syria.
Wildfires devastate Pacific Palisades and Altadena in LA.
Kendrick headlines the Super Bowl; the Eagles crush the Chiefs.
Anna Wintour steps down as editor-in-chief of American Vogue after 37 years.
Coldplay kiss-cam: the Astronomer CEO gets caught on the jumbotron.
Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce get engaged — and she announces “The Life of a Showgirl.”
Conservative activist Charlie Kirk is assassinated at a Utah campus event.
Diane Keaton dies at 79.
Thieves pull off a daylight Louvre heist — ~$100M in crown jewels gone in minutes.
Dictionary.com names “6-7” its Word of the Year. Nobody can fully explain it.
Tesla shareholders approve Elon Musk's ~$1 trillion pay package.
The longest U.S. government shutdown in history (43 days) finally ends.
Messi's Inter Miami win their first-ever MLS Cup.
Australia's under-16 social media ban takes effect.
The Milano-Cortina Winter Olympics open in Italy.
Super Bowl LX hits the Bay Area; Bad Bunny headlines the halftime show.
Artemis II launches on a 10-day voyage around the Moon.
Artemis II's lunar flyby — the farthest humans have ever been from Earth.
Eurovision returns to Vienna.